Ik kan niet de “perfecte huisvrouw” zijn met fibromyalgie, en dat is prima

Door: Alicia Thompson

Ik moet toegeven dat ik een vrij ongebruikelijk kind was. Ik ben opgegroeid met kookshows, Martha Stewart en “I Love Lucy”. Ik droomde ervan om de ideale huisvrouw van de jaren vijftig te zijn met een onberispelijk huis. (Ik weet het, noem me ouderwets, maar ik vond het leuk). Op een dag stelde ik me voor dat ik de gedetailleerde ambachten zou doen waarvoor Martha Stewart tijd vond. Ik stelde me voor gastronomische maaltijden, zelfgebakken brood, verse boter te koken en nog steeds tijd te hebben om te naaien, te knutselen, schoon te maken en een tuin te onderhouden. Ik droomde dat het op een dag perfect zou zijn.

Toen ik eindelijk mijn grote droom had, plande ik alle manieren waarop ik mijn tijd als huisvrouw zou gebruiken. Ik zou mijn huis onberispelijk houden, elke avond koken en in mijn vrije tijd aan leuke ambachten werken. Eindelijk zou ik tijd hebben om alle leuke projecten te doen waar ik over had gedroomd. Ik zou van ons huis een thuis maken, en ik was verrukt!

Maar het werkte niet zoals gepland. (En eerlijk gezegd heb ik gemerkt dat het goed is!)

Ongeveer een jaar nadat ik getrouwd was, ontdekte ik dat ik fibromyalgie had. Ik had vermoeidheid en pijn gevochten die me ervan weerhielden de meeste dingen te doen die ik had gepland. Ik merkte dat ik de meeste dagen op mijn bank lag te kijken televisie kijken en droomde van alle projecten die ik wilde doen.

In mijn echt goede dagen, heb ik mezelf buiten mijn grenzen geduwd en geprobeerd om alle dingen op mijn lijst te doen. Keer op keer probeerde ik te hard en kreeg ik veel pijn om wekenlang iets te doen. Ik was zo gefrustreerd dat, hoe hard ik ook probeerde, mijn lichaam zich overgaf.

Het is niet gemakkelijk om te accepteren dat mijn lichaam niet de kracht en energie heeft om mijn idealen te volgen. Ik heb maandenlang me schuldig, lui en nutteloos gevoeld. De frustratie om me teleur te stellen was waarschijnlijk het grootste obstakel dat ik moest overwinnen.

Heel vaak bespreken degenen in de chronische ziektegemeenschap de moeilijkheden en frustraties van de reacties van anderen op onze ziekte. Maar we vechten meer dan de verwachtingen van andere mensen. Sommige dagen moeten we de onze bevechten.

MIDDELEN VAN DE NATIONALE ASSOCIATIE VAN FIBROMIALGIA

Raak betrokken bij fibromyalgie 
Over fibromyalgie


Leven met fibromyalgie: wat is het volgende? 
Ik besefte eindelijk dat ik een stap terug moest doen om erachter te komen wat er echt toe doet. Mijn man verzekerde me keer op keer dat ik te zwaar was voor mezelf, maar het duurde lang voordat ik me realiseerde dat hij gelijk had. Het maakt hem niet uit of ons huis onberispelijk is; het maakt hem niet uit of we op sommige avonden fast food hebben; Het maakt hem niet uit dat hij op een dag alleen maar uit bed komt. Mijn vrienden komen mijn huis niet binnen en beoordelen me niet omdat het niet zo schoon is als ik denk dat het zou moeten zijn. Meestal merken mijn vrienden en familie niet eens de dingen die ik vind als mijn meest frustrerende fouten.

Eerlijk gezegd, ik moest beseffen dat ik de haak kan slaan. Ik hoef geen Martha Stewart te zijn. Ik hoef niet alles in mijn leven te hebben om gewoon perfect te zijn. Soms moeten we gewoon langzamer gaan en genieten van de schoonheid van het leven, zelfs in chaos.

Mijn leven is niet perfect En daar ben ik het mee eens

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