Von: Alicia Thompson
Ich muss zugeben, ich war ein ziemlich ungewöhnliches Kind. Ich bin mit Kochshows aufgewachsen, Martha Stewart und “I Love Lucy”. Ich träumte davon, die ideale Hausfrau der fünfziger Jahre mit einem tadellosen Haus zu sein. (Ich weiß, nenn mich altmodisch, aber es hat Spaß gemacht). Eines Tages stellte ich mir vor, ich würde die detaillierten Arbeiten machen, für die Martha Stewart Zeit fand. Ich stellte mir vor, Gourmetmahlzeiten zu kochen, selbstgemachtes Brot und frische Butter zu haben und habe immer noch Zeit zum Nähen, Basteln, Putzen und Gartenanbau. Ich träumte davon, dass es eines Tages perfekt sein würde.
Als ich endlich meinen großen Traum hatte, plante ich alle Möglichkeiten, wie ich meine Zeit als Hausfrau nutzen würde. Ich wollte mein Haus tadellos halten, jeden Abend Abendessen kochen und in meiner Freizeit Spaß am Basteln haben. Endlich würde ich Zeit haben, all die lustigen Projekte zu machen, von denen ich geträumt hatte. Ich wollte unser Haus zu einem Zuhause machen, und ich war begeistert!
Aber es hat nicht wie geplant funktioniert. (Und ehrlich gesagt habe ich bemerkt, dass es gut geht!)
Ungefähr ein Jahr nach meiner Hochzeit entdeckte ich, dass ich Fibromyalgie hatte. Ich hatte gegen Müdigkeit und Schmerzen gekämpft, die mich davon abhielten, die meisten geplanten Dinge zu tun. Ich verbrachte die meisten Tage damit, auf meiner Couch zu sitzen, vor dem Fernseher zu sitzen und von all den Projekten zu träumen, die ich wollte.
In meinen wirklich guten Tagen habe ich mich über meine Grenzen gestoßen und versucht, alles auf meiner Liste zu tun. Immer wieder habe ich mich zu sehr bemüht und hatte wehende Schmerzen, um wochenlang etwas zu tun. Ich war so frustriert, dass sich mein Körper, so sehr ich mich auch bemühte, ständig ergab.
Es ist nicht leicht zu akzeptieren, dass mein Körper nicht die Kraft und Energie hat, um meinen Idealen zu folgen. Ich habe mich monatelang schuldig, faul und nutzlos gefühlt. Die Enttäuschung, mich enttäuscht zu haben, war wahrscheinlich das größte Hindernis, das ich überwinden musste.
Sehr oft diskutieren die Angehörigen chronischer Krankheiten die Schwierigkeiten und Frustrationen der Reaktionen anderer Menschen auf unsere Krankheit. Aber wir kämpfen mehr als die Erwartungen anderer Leute. An manchen Tagen müssen wir unsere kämpfen.
RESSOURCEN DER NATIONALEN VERBINDUNG VON FIBROMIALGIA
Beteiligen Sie sich an Fibromyalgie
Über Fibromyalgie
Leben mit Fibromyalgie: Wie geht es weiter?
Endlich wurde mir klar, dass ich einen Schritt zurückgehen und herausfinden muss, was wirklich wichtig ist. Mein Mann hat mir immer wieder versichert, dass ich zu hart für mich bin, aber es hat lange gedauert, bis mir klar wurde, dass er recht hatte. Es ist ihm egal, ob unser Haus einwandfrei ist. es ist ihm egal, ob wir an manchen Abenden Fast Food haben; Es ist ihm egal, dass er an manchen Tagen nur aus dem Bett kommt. Meine Freunde betreten mein Haus nicht und richten mich nicht, weil es nicht so sauber ist, wie ich denke. Meistens bemerken meine Freunde und meine Familie nicht einmal die Dinge, die ich für meine frustrierendsten Fehler halte.
Ehrlich gesagt musste ich feststellen, dass ich vom Haken gehe. Ich muss nicht Martha Stewart sein. Ich muss nicht alles in meinem Leben haben, um perfekt zu sein. Manchmal müssen wir nur langsamer werden und die Schönheit des Lebens auch im Chaos genießen.
Mein Leben ist nicht perfekt und ich stimme dem zu
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