Petit à petit, la fibro me tue. Cela me prend des morceaux, ma force, mon orgueil et mon âme. Un diagnostic de fibromyalgie est une peine de mort pour une vie normale. J’ai vécu avec elle pendant sept ans et j’ai toujours le deuil pour la vie que j’aurais dû avoir. Je devrais être prêt à étudier une année à l’étranger maintenant. Je devrais parler une autre langue couramment. Je devrais avoir une gueule de bois tous les dimanches après avoir passé une nuit avec des amis.
Au lieu de cela, je vais au lit toute la journée. Ou s’allonger sur le canapé. Ou je vais chez quelqu’un d’autre et vais au lit ou au lit. Fibro est un ennemi juré, un ami jaloux. Il est toujours là, essayant toujours de me prendre à chaque occasion. Il est comme le méchant dans un vieux film muet. C’est un homme avec une moustache aux yeux croisés, un pull rayé et un manteau qui glisse avec humour derrière moi, qui pense que se cacher derrière une branche d’arbre le rend invisible.
Mais encore une fois, c’est le contraire.
Au lieu du public, sachant que le méchant est là et que le protagoniste est inconscient, je ne peux que le voir et mon public est aveugle. Fibrose pour ma force physique et émotionnelle. Chaque revers m’amène un peu. Je ne sais pas combien de temps cela durera jusqu’à ce que tout s’effrite. Fibro a enlevé mes fondations.
Les bases que j’ai construites pendant vingt ans sur cette terre. Je me sens comme faisant partie de Jenga, chaque fois que la fibro frappe, je m’approche du sol. Peut-être que je suis déjà tombé et brûlé. C’est peut-être le fond de la pierre. Si je ne savais pas ce qu’est la fibre, je dirais que c’est probablement comme ça. C’est le moins que je puisse être, ou le plus bas je pense que je pourrais être. Mais je ne peux pas faire autant confiance à cette malédiction.
Je pouvais ressentir la plus grande douleur de ma vie et mon fibroblaste est un défi car la prochaine fois sera pire. Certaines éclosions sont meilleures que d’autres, mais d’autres testent ma force physique et émotionnelle plus que je n’aurais pu l’imaginer auparavant. La fibromyalgie n’est pas une excuse imaginaire.
Je n’aurais jamais choisi cette vie pour moi-même et si j’avais l’occasion de me libérer du démon qui me retenait, je le ferais sans hésiter. C’est ma vie C’est vrai C’est moi et c’est et je serai avec moi à chaque instant de la journée pour le reste de ma vie.
Le diable
murmura-t-il à l’oreille
“Vous n’êtes pas assez fort pour résister à la tempête”
Aujourd’hui, j’ai chuchoté à l’oreille du diable
“Je suis la tempête”
Je suis un guerrier de la fibromyalgie
Fibromyalgie: Recherche d’âmes – Où puis-je aller maintenant
Jessica Stredd Pudicombe Plus, il y a des nuits comme ce soir où je me sens perdu. Perdu dans les émotions, perdu dans ses pensées, perdu dans la douleur et perdu dans ce qui l’attend. Pour nous, femmes, nous comprenons parfaitement les hauts et les bas de nos émotions: heureux pendant une minute, puis en colère, puis tristesse, puis nerveux, etc. Ils sont nombreux hauts et bas. Ajoutez aux maladies chroniques et à l’enfer, où allons-nous à partir de là?!?! Homme, femme, le fardeau des maladies chroniques bouleverse notre monde. Parfois, nous sentons que les choses sont sous contrôle. Nous avons accepté notre réalité, nous savons que les choses ne seront jamais ce qu’elles étaient et nous nous adaptons et apprenons à vivre avec nos vies. Mais parfois, la réalité de ce qui nous attend dépasse parfois notre réalité.
La vie que nous savions avoir été détruite par cette force perverse qui détermine ce que nous faisons et ne pouvons pas faire. Cela perturbe l’état émotionnel que nous espérions avoir avec cette nouvelle vie. Il y a des bons et des mauvais jours, des hauts et des bas, des hauts et des bas. Nous avons vu l’avenir et le plan pour l’avenir ou nous avons vécu dans le présent avec ceux que nous aimions. Maintenant, qu’est-ce qui est compatible? Rien! Les plans que nous avons faits avec des amis, peut-être une autre fois. La fête avec notre famille, eh bien, je donnerai toutes mes salutations. Faire des plans est comme le jeu cible du spectacle. Nous voulons avant tout faire partie de chaque projet réalisé, mais nous ne pouvons rien garantir.
Nous voulons vraiment faire partie de nos projets familiaux, nous voulons pouvoir mettre en œuvre des projets et les respecter. Nous voulons travailler, nous voulons sortir, nous voulons faire partie du monde dans lequel nous avons été impliqués.
Parfois, nous pouvons dire non, prendre du recul et respecter ce que notre corps nous dit. Nous pouvons seulement dire non, pas aujourd’hui. D’autres fois, oui, nous suivons les plans, nous essayons de faire partie de la vie, pour une fois, nous pouvons au moins prétendre et dire que c’était amusant, c’était agréable de sortir. Mais demain arrive. Nos corps disent ce que tu pensais La vie que nous avons connue était si différente de ce que nous pensions. Nous essayons vraiment de maintenir un semblant de ce que nous pensions être. Mais personne, personne ne pouvait se préparer à cette vie que nous vivons. Nous continuerons d’essayer de garder les plans que nous avons établis, mais n’exaltons ni ne jugeons si cela change.
Nous luttons pour maintenir une vie “normale”, mais elle a été enlevée sous nos pieds. Que reste-t-il? À partir de là, tout ce que nous pouvons faire est d’être positif, humble et surtout patient avec nous-mêmes. Prenez le temps pour nous, prenez le temps de pleurer, prenez le temps de réfléchir, prenez le temps d’apprendre notre nouvelle normalité. Et surtout, prenez une minute pour vous concentrer sur ce qui fonctionne pour nous et sur ce qui nous rend heureux. Apprenez à vivre cette nouvelle vie, apprenez à apprécier ce que nous pouvons encore vivre et aimer chaque jour. Prenez-le un jour à la fois, vivez au jour le jour, d’heure en heure ou de minute en minute. Embrasse ce que tu as et apprends à vivre et aimer la vie comme tu peux! âme
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