FIBROMYALGIE: Je ne prétends pas être malade, je fais semblant d’être bien

Si vous ne me connaissez pas assez ou si vous faites partie de ma famille, il est possible que vous ayez parfois pensé que je faisais semblant d’être malade.

Peut-être que vous pensez que vous ne pouvez pas être continuellement fatigué ou qu’il est impossible pour quelqu’un de vivre avec une douleur constante et je souhaite que ce fut le cas et moi, comme beaucoup d’autres personnes, je ne l’ai pas expérimenté pour notre famille et nos connaissances,

prétendre être bien aller travailler tous les jours même une torture brutale et nous ne pouvons que satisfaire à moitié nos obligations pilules gonflées et analgésiques, nous traînant avec difficulté pour quand nous arrivons enfin à la maison ne peut pas bouger ou la douleur intense et insupportable et un épuisement pénible à partir de laquelle nous ne récupérons jamais.

Mais malgré tout, je n’ai pas d’autre choix que d’agir comme si j’étais bien.

C’est beaucoup plus facile de faire semblant et d’essayer de me faire voir que je vais bien parce que de cette façon je n’ai pas besoin de me défendre. Je n’ai pas besoin d’expliquer à quelqu’un que vivre dans une douleur constante et constante est possible.

Je ne dois pas non plus revenir pour énumérer les symptômes chez quelqu’un qui ne ressent aucun intérêt. Je n’ai pas à justifier une fatigue implacable. Je n’ai pas à expliquer pourquoi je ne vais pas au gymnase ou à la piscine comme avant. Je voudrais bien aller, mais je ne le suis pas.

Je ne comprends pas très bien pourquoi je pense que je dois faire semblant d’être bien quand c’est le contraire. Pourquoi l’opinion des autres est-elle si importante? Pourquoi je me fiche de ce qu’ils pensent?

Je suis fatigué, très fatigué d’essayer d’expliquer comment je suis vraiment, je l’ai expliqué à la famille et aux amis qui n’ont pas compris ma réalité quotidienne, j’ai même dit aux médecins qui m’ont regardé avec incrédulité et m’ont dit que Dis Il n’est pas possible, que j’exacerbe les symptômes.

Un peu oui, Dieu merci mais pas la majorité et peut-être c’est pourquoi j’ai développé de grandes compétences en tant qu’acteur dans un rôle que je n’ai jamais demandé de me toucher.

C’est fou, mais parfois je me sens comme un criminel continuellement jugé par des gens qui ne savent rien de moi ou de ma vie et devant ce monde il vaut mieux prétendre que ceux qui te connaissent à peine ou qui ne savent rien de toi ne te donnent pas de conseils. ce que vous devriez faire sans avoir la moindre idée ou croire que vous savez mieux que moi comment je suis et ce qui me touche ou non.

Même si cela me coûte, j’essaie toujours d’être gentil quand quelqu’un me demande comment je vais. C’est une question qui parfois me fait presque éclater de colère parce que je ne peux pas dire la vérité, mais je me retiens et j’essaie de détourner le sujet ou d’essayer de le régler avec un court “Je vais bien”.

Je pourrais dire “aujourd’hui j’ai réussi à sortir du lit sans aide” ou “j’ai fait quelque chose de mieux pendant quelques jours quand la douleur me donne une pause” ou “cette semaine est un enfer parce que je vais à travers une crise “,

Mais cela conduirait à devoir justifier à nouveau mon état, à devoir expliquer pourquoi je me sens comme ça, et je ne vais probablement pas le croire, alors la réponse n’est jamais la vérité.

Je voudrais arrêter de prétendre que je me sens bien et montrer mon vrai état, je voudrais ceux qui me demandent de le faire avec un réel intérêt pour mon état et ne pas voir ou écouter comme d’autres soupçonnent que je mens quand je leur dis C’est mon état réel.

Ressens-tu le besoin de prétendre que tu vas bien quand ce n’est pas comme ça? Voulez-vous changer cela?

Si cela a été utile, commentez et partagez. Gacias! 🙂


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