Este é meu dia com fibromialgia

Hoje é o dia mais difícil depois de começar a viver com Fibromialgia e que eu tingi dias daqueles que vão esquecer. Tudo dói, e quando digo tudo, quero dizer tudo.

Ontem foi um dia difícil de eventos, muita tensão, muita dose de realidade sem vendas, muitos esclarecimentos para alguém que os merecia muito antes e que eu pensei que eles estavam dando de forma sincera e clara. 
Hoje, hoje é o dia depois de tanta emoção negativa, de tanto desabafo, de ver que seu mundo desmoronou e não há solução possível, de ver que tudo era uma farsa que você criou diante de seus olhos porque a realidade, nesse momento, era muito doloroso; mas deve ser que agora meu corpo, minha mente e meus sentimentos estejam prontos para ver e encarar a realidade.

Eu não sei por onde começar, como explicar para alguém que não sente a dor que a fibromialgia sente o que acontece em nosso corpo quando o rolo compressor decide passar por cima dele e insiste em demolir todos os cantos do seu corpo e mente

Bem, vou tentar. Levantei-me depois de ter dormido um pouco na noite anterior. Ele não tinha descansado muito graças a ontem, embora não seja inteiramente verdade, ele não descansou tanto quanto quase todas as noites. Foi difícil para mim ficar de pé e permanecer em pé até chegar ao térreo, onde fica a cozinha.

Realmente já baixa seria e sem vontade de falar, rir, explicar ou qualquer coisa; você só quer tomar café da manhã, tomar sua medicação e deitar no sofá para que as Dolores passem. O problema com isso é coexistência, porque então eles perguntam como você está e, claro, você não quer responder ao normal, então você diz algo como “cansado e um pouco dolorido”, mas o problema já está montado, já foi gerado porque sua expressão, seu rosto, seus gestos, sua falta de atenção não correspondem à resposta que você deu e então você começa a criar um clima desagradável na mesa.

Quando esse teste de fogo termina, você se levanta com dificuldade e toma a medicação para ver se ela ajuda em alguma coisa. Você volta para cima e tira o seu pijama para se refrescar, sair e deitar no sofá para ver se as coisas estão acontecendo. Naquele momento meus pés, pernas, cintura e costas doíam. Os olhos começam a queimar e você se sente muito desconfortável. O fato é que você não só se sentir desconfortável por isso machuca, você se sentir desconfortável porque hoje você tivesse aquajogging e não pode ir, porque você gostava de fazer as coisas e não pode fazer nada; Você está sujeito a estar na cadeira de sempre sem poder sair para levar o ar para o terraço.

Minha filha de quatro anos insiste em ir para a cama comigo na poltrona, então eu, depois de um tempo, já começo a me sentir desconfortável com seus movimentos e porque ela quer brincar comigo. O que mais eu quero hoje !!!! Mas eu não entendo o que você diz, a TV ligada, Pablillo pedindo a volta do tecido, ela falando comigo; É demais para mim, minha mente não é de todo lúcido, minhas habilidades são menos de 20% e eu começo a desesperar, sentir inútil, a sentir que eu valho tudo, entender que eu não dei nada de positivo a ninguém e Eu tenho o que eu mereço.

Então, antes de me aborrecer, decidi subir para dormir no meu quarto, até onde minha filha me persegue e me dá um encontro com meu marido se vestindo. Então ele me pergunta como eu continuo e se vou para a cama lá. Eu explico como eu sou, independentemente de as Dolores serem tão insuportáveis ​​que elas saltem e eu diga sim, eu vou para a cama na sala para tentar descansar. Foi quando eu alucinar mais do que eu pensei que nunca iria ter alucinações, meu marido me pede para explicar o que é o que ele pediu o dom reis anão de sair para comprá-lo.

Meu rosto deve ter mostrado o que eu realmente senti naquele momento, raiva, frustração, desolação; Perguntei se ele ia me deixar assim e com as crianças em casa. Sua resposta foi mais esclarecedora do que sua atitude durante todos esses anos. Sim, pensei em aproveitar o tempo, as crianças não vão incomodar você e os cães menos. As crianças não vão incomodá-lo; minha filha de quatro anos não vai me incomodar, mas ela não entende como me sinto, ela agora está girando na cama onde estou deitado e até mesmo seu movimento me causa uma dor absolutamente indescritível.

Porque não é que a garota me incomoda, é que ela é uma menina e você não pode pedir para ela não me ensinar como fazer a roda de carro na cama e me fazer mover acidentalmente ou me bater ou apenas mover o colchão que meu corpo estremece em uma dor incisiva que me custou muito para me recuperar.

Eu me sentia solitário, abandonado, mas então entendi rapidamente; Não é abandono, é simplesmente incompreensão. Ele estava alucinando quando eu disse a ele que meu primeiro marido me deixou com uma crise e ele estava indo em uma viagem deixando as crianças para seus pais, não agora

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